Reflective Listening

It really works. I find it very cheesy to practice and be practiced on, but I always feel listened to and cared for. It is especially helpful in difficult relationships or situations. Everyone has times where you just don’t know how to respond to someone, but reflective listening has really helped reduce these occurrences for me. Reflective Listening is a technique to really listen and love others. The basic idea is that you start with a hedger and then state the feeling and thought of what you just heard.

I often want Brian to listen to me, to help me problem solve, to care and share in my life & experiences. The most helpful use for me recently has been when a friend has been gossiping. I used to never know what to say and still frequently forget or don’t think to really listen, but when I do, the gossip changes from gossip about someone else to really sharing about self and growing up personally. It is a privilege to be able to participate in someone’s growth just by listening and caring for them, especially when it could have been a very negative situation resulting in hurt and pain.
Here are some other useful articles on reflective listening:

from Communication in Organizations

7 Don’ts

Are You Listening? (PDF)

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