Archive for July, 2007

Pens and Tears

Eila was coloring nicely with a pen on some paper in the living room while I cleaned up lunch. She was imitating me writing notes and making lists. Josiah was cruising around trying to figure out what Eila was doing and how he could join in. Then, I heard Josiah’s cries on pain and asked Eila “What happened to Joe?” as I came around the corner. She said “I colored him.” Indeed, she did. Josiah had ten stabs and lines all over his head and hands, up his arm and on his face. I quickly picked him up and examined the damage, which he was now fine with and began to sob. I tried wiping him off as gently as possible, since already each mark seemed to have been a bit painfully administered. Eila was in shock at my tears over her artwork on Josiah. As I sent her to time out for coloring on something besides paper and for hurting her brother, she screamed. When I calmed and went to talk to her, she talked to me about crying and talking and hurting other people. I think she was really sorry. I was too.

I want to protect and shelter my kids from any pain. I want them to really love each other and look out for each other, not inflict and torment each other. I want to set a good example for them in how to respond to their own pain and others. I want to be a good mom with good kids – too bad I live in a bad world full of bad people, of which I am one of the worst. Fortunately, I serve a great God who enables me to be a great mom with great kids. How quickly I forget and doubt!

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Friday’s Feast

Appetizer
What is your favorite fruit?

whatever is in season – currently blueberries!

Soup
Who is someone you consider as a great role model?

my mother

Salad
If you were to spend one night anywhere within an hour of your home, where would you choose?

I’d go back to the Dearborn Hyatt Regency, especially if dinner and breakfast were included in this adventure.

Main Course
Name something you do too often.

Scold Eila.

Dessert
Fill in the blank: I really like ___________ because ____________.

I really like Brian because he is so amazing in more ways than I could ever list.

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Planning Vacation

I don’t know why this is so difficult, but planning a vacation is something that stresses me out to the max. I am starting to believe that it might have to do with a deeper issue (don’t stressors always have a trigger?), like wanting to please those I love the most and who will be in close quarters with me during this vacation. But, then again, I think it could just be my OCD/perfectionist craziness. I want my vacations to be perfect – to see all there is to see, to eat well all the time, to sleep well and most of all to have a fabulous time doing whatever I want to do. In order for the vacation to be perfect there is a lot of planning involved. I need to research every possible thing to see or do and find the best possible place to stay and dining options while considering the budget and what will work for our family. I think this is also complicated by the fact that my beloved mate doesn’t have much to say usually, but for vacations offers his opinion and so I want to take that into consideration and make his trip perfect too. I have usually have lots of opinions, so this is no exception. But, when visiting a new place, I fear making a wrong choice and screwing it up for everyone. Failure: my biggest fear! Mixing fear of failing and fear of letting others down – I’m afraid that I might be believing a lie – this is recipe for disaster. The truth is that my self-worth is not based on my performance and other’s opinions of me, but on Christ and His work on the cross. Thank God that He is God and I am NOT!

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Chores

I’ve been reading about kids doing chores and wondering what age and what types of chores are good for starting out. It appears that many people (ok, maybe not many, but at least a couple of parents) start their toddlers with simple chores, like “helping” with laundry, emptying the dishwasher, setting the table and cleaning up, dusting, and even making beds.

At our house, we don’t make beds, but maybe it would be a good thing to start now – Josiah could do his bed as there isn’t much to do and Eila could pull up her blankets, I think she might even like it. For laundry, Eila already occasionally helps me transfer loads from washer to dryer and I heard that some kids really enjoy cleaning out the lint trap. Josiah seems to love the dishwasher, at least as a climbing gym, and Eila knows where the silverware go and helps when she is in the mood. I don’t trust her to help with setting the table and clearing it, but would like her to try to take care of her place at the table. So, I guess it’s time to make a chart or at least a list of chores and remember to include Eila in these activities.

I found a fabulous website for just this sort of thing and I may sign up and keep track online. I’ll probably do rewards, but not allowance at this point. I never got an allowance growing up, but it might be good for older kids in learning to budget and handle money. We’ll see as we get to that point. For now, Eila thinks that stickers are the coolest, and nothing in the world could be ice cream as a reward. One reward I might try is letting her choose books to read or videos or something like that; I don’t want food to be the only reward – something I personally struggle with.

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Friday’s Feast

Appetizer
How many pieces of jewelry do you wear most days?

If you count each earring and ring separately, I typically wear 5 pieces.

Soup
What is your favorite instrumental song?

Pachelbel’s Canon in D

Salad
Who has a last name that you like?

Me.

Main Course
Name a popular movie you’ve never seen.

Star Wars Episode 3 or Lord of the Rings (I only saw the first one & hated it.)

Dessert
Fill in the blank: Nothing makes me ___________ like ____________.

Nothing makes me happy like spending time with my family.

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Mildly Amusing Stuff

Here are some things you may or may not find funny. I find that I am starting to be able to laugh at myself – a little bit, but only because if I don’t I’ll be the only one not laughing and feel very left out.

While talking to Brian as he sat at the computer, I noticed that I couldn’t see quite right. Then, I heard something hit the ground and realized that the lens fell out of my glasses. Since, I couldn’t really see without the lens I couldn’t find it and stood there with my glasses on, but only one lens – what a nerd!

Nature was calling and as I obeyed the call, I found a small potty seat stuck to my behind. I had sat down rather firmly on Eila’s potty seat and came up with it still there, for just a second…

At Target, I was seen loudly calling to no one “Can you come out of the clothes by yourself or do you need me to help you?” This was shortly after I was seen taking clothes off of Eila while chasing her and trying to put her shoes back on her.

Everytime I see a smudge on the wall in our living room, I think it’s a bug. I jump slightly (sometimes more) and my heart races – I swear Brian does this too, but maybe that’s just me trying not to be alone in this.

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Friday’s Feast

Appetizer
Name a funny habit you have.

I unconsciously scrunch up my nose whenever I wear my glasses.

Soup
If you could instantly know how to play a musical instrument, which one would you pick?

Tuba.

Salad
How long is your hair?

long ~7 inches to donate if I cut off a ponytail

Main Course
When was the last time you forgave someone, and who was it?

5 hours ago, I forgave Eila for hitting me when I said she couldn’t have more juice

Dessert
What is your favorite kitchen appliance?

I guess it’s the microwave- to warm up my cookies.

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New Year’s Resolutions Update

These were my resolutions for 2007: 1) Serve others by God’s grace, not my own efforts to earn their approval or praise, but as a response of love – giving a gift to God (as I would to a friend or someone that might deserve a special something). 2) Obey God and move forward in what He has already given me to do, even if it’s scary or difficult or seemingly unimportant or non-essential.

Basically, to BE NICER.
Am I being nicer?

Well, not yelling isn’t going so well.  I haven’t slammed too many doors or thrown anything large or dangerous.  That’s not really saying much.  But, I have confessed – to both God and either Eila or Brian, when my anger at the injustice of it all has flared.

As for helping others, I have helped others when it has been convenient or I’ve been asked to do so, but I haven’t gone out of my way to be nice and lend a hand.  And once, I even complained out loud, which definitely wasn’t nice.  Although, I have been faithfully praying for others and that’s the nicest thing I can think to do, and most helpful.

Finally, being nicer to the strangers I encounter every day: cashiers, wait staff, other drivers and shoppers. I have done pretty well in common courtesy towards them, even making polite conversation.  On occasion, I’ve reflectively listened and truly cared for these strangers.

In the first goal: to be nicer, I’m making some improvements, but there is still plenty of room for more.

My second goal, the catch all, is a good reminder to be to do what I tell Eila to do every day:  Listen and Obey.  I can think of a few things that I should do right now and one of them is to stop typing and start praying. So, off I go.

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