Shannon Yee

I totally agree with the love and logic philosophy, which is basically summarized in the idea that children need a secure foundation of love shown through empathy before delivering consequences and calm, consistent parenting with logical, natural consequences (not saving kids from the cost of their mistakes). Limited and abundant choices are an integral part of helping children have a sense of control over their lives and then not fight you in the areas where you take control. The first parenting rule of Love & Logic is: Adults set limits without anger, lectures, threats, or repeated warnings. I think this is great advice because I want to be able to parent in a way that means that my children obey me the first time and without any yelling.

I found this book to be really practical and therefore helpful in the daily tasks of mothering. For me, choosing and using the same phrase every time my kids need some correction has been really great. It helps me to remain calm and alleviates the need to think in the moment of frustration. I can simply and calmly say one thing and the kids know that they have done something wrong and often fix their behavior right then, before I even start moving. Using delayed consequences also allows me to remain calm and in control and then deliver meaningful consequences rather then empty threats or saying something I don’t mean in the heat of the moment.

While I really agree with the book and think it has wonderful and very useful ideas, I do not think it is the solution to all of life’s problems as the authors would have you believe. I found their arguments, logic and resulting conclusions to be irritating in their over-simplicity. I felt like they were talking to me as a small child and didn’t really like the tone of the book.

All in all, the book is a great tool for parents of young kids, using what works for your family and leaving the rest.